I've been fighting with the dark cloud the last few months and lately it feels like it's winning. I get up every morning, but can't seem to get myself out into the sun or even some days off the sofa. I sleep and sleep and sleep and when I am not sleeping I am eating. Funny how quickly you forget the pain of living with this cloud only a few months ago I was bouncing round the city as if I'd never known the emptiness the spacial silence of this mood destroyer of this living death.
I am resolved to fight it though, I have already given 20 years away to this demon and I won't give in again without a fight. I keep asking myself what is it your so afraid of? why do you let this madness paralyze you and stop you from finding some acceptable existence. I dream of travel and experience nothing excessive mind you. I don't want to be a millionaire or famous, I just want to live the life I dream of the one where I want to do something and I do it, how can that be something to be afraid of?
Hey, hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteI find exercize to be helpful, but I'm never motivated to start it while depressed. Other things that help include drinking tea or yerba mate, and eating stuff with a lot of olive oil and fresh veg. Also chocolate. And marmite, since being short on B12 can be a factor.
Making appointments can get me off the couch also, so like lunch dates or whatever.
You're not asking for advice, so sorry for forcing it on you. Whenever I hear somebody is depressed, I always want to feed them.
Thanks Charles always nice to know someone is wanting to help out there I appreciate that.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the Advice Dr Rudford, I don't see anything suggesting older people are more susceptible to depression than younger people, but thanks for your advice.
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